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By 2023 I might have finished the album I started 15 years ago

November 1, 2011

The learning to write music plan is going well. Better than expected in some ways. I’ve so far managed to overcome the self-defeating procrastination fairly well and put in some practice most days. More importantly I’ve managed to get back into it again on those occasions where other things (sleep mostly) prevent me practicing for a while. I’ve got a pretty good balance between time spent studying and time spent improvising and writing tracks.

I had completely forgotten about the ‘cold light of day’ issue that comes with any creative project, where you work hard into the night on the best track/illustration/whatever EVER only to find it’s a bucket of poo when you review it the next day. I’m not finding it too difficult to deal with this time round as I feel I’m making some real progress, I’ve also accepted that it is an important part of the learning process even if it’s a little cringe-inducing at times.

Learning music theory properly is one of the most inspiring experiences, although I’m disappointed I’ve not made the effort previously. The need to understand music theory appears to be fairly subjective, I’ve spoken to some talented musicians who claim to know no theory and in the past I’ve lazily tried to convince myself that I could be one of them. I’ve also realised how much I’ve tried to persuade myself that by writing ‘experimental’ music I could sidestep the effort involved in learning how to do things properly. The acceptance that I need a technical understanding of a subject before I can be creative with it has taken a long time to get to but I’m glad of it. I can’t state strongly enough how much difference a basic understanding of theory has made to me and I really wish I’d done this years ago. Music theory is good yeah!

I’ve been learning through a variety of sources, the best being Michael Hewitt’s Music Theory for Computer Musicians. I was a bit put off by the name expecting something a little reductive but it’s proved a brilliant introduction to theory, the book title could do without the ‘for Computer Musicians’ bit as the computer music side of things is minimal.

So, I’m getting there and hopefully soon will be able to translate the noises in my head into a format that other people can hear. I’ve got a Soundcloud account http://soundcloud.com/anxioussilence which I’m considering uploading some bits and pieces to once I’ve got the hang of structure a bit more. I am very wary of posting anything publicly as don’t really want (at this point) to encourage criticism because I am a delicate flower (who can’t be fucked with arguing with people on the internet). I’m also incredibly wary of any of my friends hearing any of my nonsense as many of them are incredibly talented musicians who may instantly hate me once they become aware of my utter lack of talent, on the other hand they might be astounded and instantly agree to form a world destroying industrial hip-hop band with me.

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    I am Bob. This is my blog. It is an outlet and a substitute for real life. It contains my art, photography, illustration and thoughts on mental health (I deal with anxiety on a pretty much constant basis).

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